Boom Roasted Apron

Do you need this apron? Absolutely, you do.

A quick synopsis of the Pesach story: Mose and his brother (assistant to the regional liberator) demand that Pharaoh free the Jews, but Pharaoh says, "False." So, Mose brings a series of plagues. Blood alone moves the wheels of history, so that comes first. After each plague, Pharaoh asks what would make them stop, to which Mose replies, "Did I stutter?"¹ Finally, Mose brings the 10th plague, Threat Level Midnight, and the Jews leave. His sister sings a song after the Red Sea splits because that's what she said.   

Also, the art on this apron is the prettiest art of all the art.

If none of this makes sense, you are not the intended audience for the product.

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¹ He did.